Tahun 2014

Tahun 2014,
Tahun yang penuh musibah.
Semoga esok, lusa dan hari seterusnya lebih indah.

Deeply Tired

Sleepless night,

Powerless mind,

Hopeless heart,

Sorrowfulness soul.

I am deeply tired.

#Thirteen

I am fly up high,

Beyond the skies,

A lot to strive,

In dreams to dive.

Thank You

Dear Buddy,

Thank you for spending your time with me almost every week throughout this year.
Thank you for having me when we hunting for new cafe, coffee, and pastry.
Thank you for listening to my not-so-cool bullshit stories about my life, work and study.
Thank you for being such a good friend since the past eight years since school.
Thank you for the adventures you included me in. Such a wonderful experience!

Thank you Nesh!

The Chambers: Separuh Masa

Berat mata memandang,
Berat lagi bala yang menyandang.

Mungkin ini satu pengakhiran,
Buat kalian, keempat cinta.

Akan aku putuskan seorang dari kalian,
Dalam tempoh separuh masa.

Mungkin ya benar ada,
Mungkin juga ya jika tiada.

Kebarangkalian buat salah satunya tinggi,
Lebih mudah jika ianya sama rata.

Bukankah begitu lebih baik?
Realitinya, pemenangnya hanya seorang saja.

My Heart

It just take a glance,
And I saw you,
It was you.

My heart.

Banjir Di Semenanjung

Dalam kelam, semakin tenggelam,
Dalam basah, semakin susah.

Anak baru dua bulan kini demam panas,
Kucing, ikan entah ke mana, kebun pula tenggelem dek air.

Sabarlah anak, redhalah kakak,
Angah mohon doa semua selamat.

Pantai Timur lumpuh, Kuala Kangsar pun sama,
Jika perlu pindah, maka bersedialah kalian,

Reflection

I don't really look into someone's eyes because of reflection.

Silau weh! >.<

‪#‎TheChambers‬

Dark Cloud

O' dark cloud,

Over my head,

There is no doubt,

How you live in me,

The fire is on,

When you wanted to,

When I'm with him,

I think of you,

And I'm so alone,

And I'm so alone--

Banjir

Terduduk aku di hadapan komputer,
Terdengarkan berita banjir yang melanda,
Jika di Pantai Timur, ya aku tiada sesiapa,
Tapi di Kuala Kangsar, aku ada keluarga di sana.

Jika di Kuala Lumpur, hujan sentiasa,
Mereka di sana, entah apa khabarnya,
Hati risaukan Si Mia, anak saudara,
Harap semua baik-baik hendaknya.

Rindu

Dingin malam itu,
Sejuk hingga membeku,
Dari tulang hingga ke isi kuku,
Hati terus sebak dan sayu,
Sepasang nisan dilepaskan rindu.

Postgraduate Conference

Alhamdulillah. 

I finished both my oral and poster presentation for 3rd Postgraduate Conference on Science and Technology Studies, organized by Department of Science and Technology Studies, Faculty of Science, University of Malaya, Kuala Lumpur.

This is the final week and finally I can have some rest before my final paper. Well, at least everything is paid off.

Zzz.

The Chambers: Stalker

Aku pemerhatimu dalam senyap,
Dari segala laman yang kau ada,
Dan aku tak tahu jika kau sedar,
Aku kini menjadi pembaca segala cerita,
Yang kau kongsikan bersama,
Aku kini seorang stalker senyap,
Pemerhati setia kepada empat teruna.

A Lady and A Guy

A lady and a guy,
Meet each other, making loves.

A lady and a guy,
Meet each other, two hearts break.

A lady and a guys,
Meet each other, many possibilities.

Worth

When you've tried so hard and those people still with their same old ignorance and attitude.

You'd know that it's time to move on, walk off.

Some other things really are not worth to fight for.

Tolong

Diberi kepak, hendakkan peha,
Dimintanya dada, dipijaknya kepala.

Mahunya yang orang punya,
Kerna sendiri tidak ada.

Tolong sini, tolong sana,
Ungkit pula kemudiannya.

Lega

Semester ni lagi banyak pegang microphone dari bass dan guitar, keyboard lagilah jangan cerita.

Tiap hari susah hati seperti ada beban di atas kepala. 

Hilang satu bala, kelegaan yang tak terhingga macamlah dah habis periksa.

The Chambers: Love and Single

NO WONDER!

By #9GAG

AN EXPLANATION!

By #8DICT

Hilang

Sebuah cereka bersama runtunan jiwa,

Segerombolan manusia yang patah hatinya,

Seorang perempuan hilang sinar matanya,

Sekeping nota terakhir ditinggalkan olehnya.

Tired

My eyes are tired,
Seeing your reply to her text.

My heart is tired,
Knowing that you fall to her.

My brain is tired,
Thinking of you ending up with her.

I am tired.

The Chambers: Release

Melihatkan kegagalan aku untuk meneruskan niat maka perlu dilepas seorang dua dari kalian, jauh untuk dikenang walau dari sudut imaginasi yang dalam. Satu dari empat akan diketahui apa nasibnya namun kebarangkalian untuk menjadi kosong juga tidak terkecuali. Jika benar ini terjadi aku akan teruskan dengan pelan sampingan yang belum pernah digunapakai dalam apa jua situasi. Semoga kalian bertemu jodoh dan hidup gembira selamanya.

Unfinished Business

Now I'm so glad that I'm not going to ‪#RTW14 because my nightmare seems like everywhere.

A true friend will try to listen to your story before jump to the conclusion, but you choose not to. I was deeply hurt but the worst part is when things getting viral among friends and I have to eat all the blame when I was alone.

You should confront me not to run from this matter. Whoever press the unfriend and block button first is the loser. I'm just glad that I don't have to press my button first. Clearly, we have unfinished business here.

I've already put past behind but don't forget to say hi if we meet one day. I meant, all of you.

‪

Final Week

Since this week is the final week and there's still some date line to meet. =/

Good luck and all the best to everyone especially STS students. You can do it! =D

Keep calm, do your work, stay safe and please don't be crazy! :3

#MondayMotivation
#fulltimestudentworker
#ScienceTechSustainability

Kecundang

Kejatuhan seorang perempuan adalah lelaki,
Kekuatan seorang lelaki adalah perempuan,
Jika kau jatuh kerna kau tak cukup kuat,
Kau adalah seorang pengalah - kecundang!

Salah kau juga meletakkan nasibmu pada tangan manusia,
Kau perlu ingat ini dalam kepala, kau itu cuma seorang hamba,
Masih perlu akan rasa hidup bertuhankan yang Esa,
Bangkitlah! Jalan hidupmu masih jauh, hingga kau mati dimamah usia.

Longlai

Malam kian larut,
Tiada bulan kelihatan,
Hanya menampakkan awan--

Pasang dan surutnya laut,
Dengan deruan ombak menghempas,
Hanya tubuh longlai terdampai di pantai--

Remuk dan ranapnya jiwa,
Tubuh berdarah dan dipenuhi luka,
Apakah tubuh longlai itu masih bernyawa?

Backing Off

In a year from now, she told you that she will get married. You already said that you will be waiting a year as well. But never realized that another girl is observing you from far each and everyday - silently. And hoping that you will notice her present. If this is a triangle love, she will back off and not gonna intrude the two of you although no one is attached in a relationship.

Hidup Gembira

Berhiduplah dengan gembira,

Walau kau takut dan derita,

Di saat kau tak punyai siapa,

Jangan kau pernah sekali lupa,

Tuhan mu akan selalu ada.

Friendship - Relationship

Talking about marriage again today with a friend in library. I really have different ideology what marriage really is. It's not just about partnership, but friendship-relationship. I always feels that friendship is much stronger than relationship, to stand mutually. So yeah, it has to be friendship-relationship kinda things, so the relationship is much closer than friendship. Sound like confusing but hell yeah I think it suppose to be that way. 

Satu

Retak satu jiwa, diremukkan sebegitu rupa,
Apa boleh kembali seperti asalnya?
Rabak satu hati, direnyukkan begitu saja,
Apa boleh pulih seperti sedia kala?

Time

She said,
As the time will be wasted,
For remembering your face,
She will forget you, eternally.

Sama dan Beza

Apa yang ada di atas kepalaku.
Tidak mungkin sama seperti apa di dalam kepalaku.
Jauh lagi berbeza dengan apa yang ada dalam hatiku.

Pending 2

Reminder for myself of my pending task/assignments.

11/12 - Discussion Research Method
12/12 - Draft poster submission
13/12 - Article submission
16/12 - Presentation and essay submission
18/12 - Final discussion Research Method
19/12 - Poster submission
20/12 - Final Research Method presentation and written proposal submission
22 & 23/12 - Conference paper presentation
31/12 - Individual slide presentation submission
January - EXAM

I'm working based on date line. So yeah don't try to waste my time.

Emergency

Bangun pagi - mandi - iron baju.

Fikir jap - hantar text.

Sambung tidur. *hibernate*

***

Demam tapi tak ada MC jadi kita EL je hari ni. >.<

Dia

Sepertinya aku kelihatan gembira melihat dia.
Terasa mahu pergi kepadanya dan teriak namanya.
Tapi aku pun tidak ketahui siapa dia sebenarnya.
Lalu aku menjerit "hey, hey, awak kat sana!"

4 Months

4 months.
One third of a year.
But you still didn't find me back.

Perempuan Kachak

Manusia rebel itu kelihatan lebih kacak dari biasa,
Bisa kata lebih dari kebanyakkannya teruna,
Juga tidak jatuh dalam kalangan gadis jelita,
Cuma beliau berada di antara keduanya,
Hakikatnya beliau sedar akan jantina sebenarnya,
Seorang perempuan yang kachak paras rupa--

Two Faces

The nicest person that seems harmless is the one who might be the most cruel and harmful.

I can sense that someone will take credits on my job.

Again

Again, I choose to cut my hair and shaved on my right side.

Like nobody business.

The Chambers: Characters

Four unlucky guys were selected to become The Chambers, a name that I've created to describe them where they don't even know about their existence to me or among themselves.

So here are the characteristics that I observed from them through out this year. But it will reflected back with my type of guy. Sound scary huh?

1. Non smoker
2. Not a musician
3. Not a football fan/player
4. A cat lover

Chamber 1: Scored 1/4. Smoker, musician, football fan, cat lover.
Chamber 2: Scored 2/4. Non smoker, musician, football fan, cat lover.
Chamber 3: Scored 1/4. Smoker, musician, football fan, cat lover.
Chamber 4: Scored 3/4. Non smoker, not a musician, football fan, cat lover.

To be honest, I'm more close to the First Chamber compared to the rest.
The Second Chamber somehow makes me want to get know him further.
The Third Chamber is someone that I used to know back from my teenage years.
The Fourth Chamber is the most mysterious among all although he is a good guy.

So which of The Chambers will made it?

I'll leave up to time.

Point

There's a point in this life,
Where we need to stop,
Holding breath, thinking deep,
Then start all over again.

Sometimes

Sometimes, 

We have to learn to let go,

Things that we love to do,

Even caterpillar have to learn to fly,

To become a wonderful butterfly,

So why not us, to try?

Struggling-Juggling

Currently, I'm struggling to juggling with these:

• Work
• Study
• Music
• Life
• Health
• Personal

Say Sorry Then Explain!

Note this please!

1. When you have done something wrong, straight away say SORRY and EXPLAIN.
2. Just admin what have you done and NEVER try to put the blame on other person.
3. Don't wait after so long to do so.  Don't be a CHICKEN without balls.
4. Don't talk bullshit without getting your FACTS right.
5. Don't wait for someone to INITIATE then the rest will come in together. 
6. Since you are the one who START it first and choose not to BOTHER, why I can't do the same?
7. And don't PRETEND that nothing is going on!

THESE ARE BULLSHIT!

#SayNOtoCOUPLE

Ok. Ok. Fine! =_________=

Officially single since 2005. </3

‪#‎SayNOtoCOUPLE‬

Who Are The Chambers?

Who are they? Are they really exist?

Four unlucky guys who never knew that they are The Chambers, never get idea what are they menat to me. Really, bad luck for them.

The State of Ignorance

Since they are used to it, until they forgot that the fact is I'm a girl too.

Served back!

I Wish

To have more time.

Happy Birthday Ang!

Dear Ang, Happy Birthday. =)

There's a lot of things I want to talk to you but first, please return.
Where ever you are, please stay safe and find a way to come back.
I'll be here waiting for you and the rest too. We're not giving up.
Someday, everything will be back to normal.
We will meet each other again, until then.
But for now, good luck and all the best. Be happy always.

Regards,

Izzah

Routine

Wake up in the morning,

Having coffee and dreaming,

Studying, working, and sleeping.

Keep calm and repeat routine.

Jengkel?

Situasi: Dua beradik sedang menonton TV.

Adik: Angah, mengjengkelkan tu apa?
Kakak: Mengjengkelkan tu maksudnya annoying. Dia hmm macam menyampah?

I Am

I am Qis’z Aziz.

***

I was born with named Izzah Aziz. I've been called as Qis'z, a given name during my junior year in boarding school. Thus, I'm using both names, combined and became Izzah Iqiz Aziz since 2004, ten years ago, which explains why I do have a long signature.

I may look small but actually I am not! I'm an adult who can be with or work with those who don't mind how do I look, how my hairdo is, how many studs that I have on my ears, how many scars that I've all over my body, why I can't drive, why I'm not good with girls, why I can't even have a boyfriend, why I can't gain weight and become fat, and so many never ending bull shit questions keep on being ask by others.

Regardless my family background, my music background, my real education background, and what I really do in my real life. I pay respect with race, religion and culture. However, I don't feel that is wrong for Malay not being Malay but it's wrong for a Muslim not to be a Muslim. I don't give a damn with my skin color to be a racist. I was exposed to Chinese education system at the very young age but I speak Manglish most of the time.

I'm a girl that belongs in a group that will get rejected surely by your mom who will think that I'm retarded. A girl that people will see with closed eyes, not giving attention and being underestimate with my own capability, like rubbish on the street or a ball that you can kick.

I like to take photos especially food and scenery. I don't really do selfie except for my own profile photo. I like things naturally, so I won't do any editing on it.  I hate seeing girls with over make up, acting cute, plus with high heels and short skirts. They just torturing themselves to impress people that not even bother. A girl who don't even know how defend herself, keep on rely on others, do not have effort to learn. They are weak. That's what I call as Bimbo, bitches!

And somehow, these keeps me going, keeps me striving. Although I'm so broken, cold, stubborn, fragile and rotten inside, I know that somehow I'll get through this shit because I've been deeply drown before. I'm strong, massive, loyal, and whatsoever shit people won't see in me. Obviously, they can only realize that I don't know how to lie and my impressions speak out my emotions.

People said; if you can't suit with any other group then you're belong to punk. Well said, I'm a Punker as far as I can remember. I've changed from playing guitar to bass as it fits my sorrow soul, a deep cut slowly heal, but I'm trapped in my own space. Hence, I started to find some lights which bring a little happiness. Well at least it works, although for a while.

I may look serious but I am not. I starting to wear spectacles since I was 12 but still not used to it. I know that I have these big eyes which don't have any other special function except to see. I’m having both insomnia and nocturnal habit which cause me difficulty to sleep at night. High tolerance of caffeine sometimes makes me fall asleep faster than dairy products. I like books especially those are related with Biology, Mathematics and Science. I prefer to read English novel instead of Malay and I like to read translated graphic novels.

I honestly don't have a type. If I like you, then I like you. Somehow, I can gain passiveness and negativeness surround me easily. I'm very positive and optimistic but I've highly empathy towards people. That makes me aware of choosing my friends. Most are acquaintance and only few will be in my pocket. I rarely talking harsh towards people but if I do, you are dead.

I have very different idea about marriage especially with the Muslim Malay wedding. I hate things to be complicated when it can be simplify as shit. I'm not rejecting marriage but I really do have problem with Muslim Malay wedding system. The most shit thing about this is dowry where I just feels like it is not necessary.

I’m not flawless. Beauty is subjective and I've choose what's mine. I am Qis'z, rareness with awesomeness. Deal with it!

But are these really important to bother you anyway?

Hell. I don't care!

Saturday, November 1, 2014.

Grey

When there's black and white, I'd choose grey.

#Fourteen

Every time,
When the date is 30th of the month,
The same ritual will be done,
Write a poem, counting days,
And wait.

November 30, 2014.

Type

I honestly don't have a type.
If I like you, then I like you.

June 17, 2013.

Subjek

"Izzah ambik berapa subjek sem ni?"
"Adalah."
"Tiga?"
"Tak."
"Empat ke?"
"Taklah."
"Takkan lima kot?"
"Lima." =D

Backup Man

I have no boyfriend but I have four backup man. 

The Chambers. Whoa!

F.U.N.N.Y!

Funny how a new staff called me at 7.06 am and 7.26 am just to informed that she will be late. I haven't reached office yet, was ironing my shirt! Why don't you reported straight away to the Finance Manager since the position that you applied for is Account Executive? And I really don't know why we should have an Account Executive when the company is already have the Finance Manager? Why never asked the receptionist to assist in accounting? Well I did that before tho I'm doing administrative. And until now the company never hire someone to assist me on tenders. The fact that I'm the one and only admin left for this company is just a full time master student. I'm curious enough when I found that the Account Executive who is only a diploma holder and still haven't completed her degree starting salary was RM2.8K, back then when she just graduated. REALLY? I don't think so. Most of my friend said usually they will become an Account Assistant first. And she managed to bargain now to start at RM3.8K. She only have diploma with 5 years experience but her salary is wayyyyy more than what I get.

Here come the stupid question why I still not resigned off. Will you pay my study loan???

My mom will be retired in 6 more months and I'm going to take care things in my family. I better be ready! Phew~

Kelakar

Tak tau nak rasa kelakar ke tak bila staf baru ni tanya,

"Izzah, you tak ada kerja ke?"
"Saya dah siap buat kerja saya"
"Kalau you nak buat assignment you buat kat office ke?"
"Saya tengah buatlah ni"
"Oh, habis kalau you nak print nota macam mana?"
"Saya print jelah kat office"

***

Lupa. Dia pun belajar lagi.

Opah dan Konvo

Saya sangat kagum dan bangga dengan Opah Hajjah Mariah yang hadir dalam setiap satu konvo para cucunya.

2011, enam dari dua puluh orang cucu Opah tamat belajar. Beliau tekad menghadiri kesemua majlis konvo bermula dari konvo saya seterusnya diikuti dengan yang lain.

Ditakdirkan hari kejadian adalah jatuh pada hari Sabtu, sesi pertama, 8.30 pagi. Selepas Subuh kami terus bertolak ke kampus, risau kalau tak ada parking atau dapat parking jauh. Yalah, kaki Opah pun bukan kuat mana. Kesian dengan Mak dan Opah sebab tak sempat nak sarapan dah kena masuk dewan. Kesian sebab kena berlapar tunggu sesi kami habis dalam pukul 2 petang. Walaupun dah tak larat tapi semangatnya kuat! Pergi surau pun masih nak kayuh basikal.

Ada rezeki Ija konvo lagi sekali, Opah datang lagi ya?

‪#CucuKetiga

Designers VS Engineers

Designers and Engineers via @9GAGTweets

***
Between the two chambers.

And both of my cousins too.

‪#‎Deep‬

Lazy Sunday

Reviewing life.
Having breakfast. 
Thinking deep.
Building courage.

***
While listening to Talking Dreams Deluxe Album by Echosmith.

Sunday, November 23, 2014, 10.42 am.

Tell Her You Love Her

She said she loves you
Tell her you love her too

***
Echosmith

One

As the heart has four chambers,
One need to be close,
One have to let go,
One is still remain silent,
One, I really don't know what's inside his mind.

Maybe I should find the right one.

The Truth Remain Untold

Flash back a year ago,
Full with bull shit.

Bitch!

New Chapter

Another new chapter.

Shifted to another place.

Segumpal Daging Bernama Hati

Ku coretkan sebuah cerita di sini,

Tentang segumpal daging bernama hati,

Walau parah terkoyak rabak macam nak mati,

Bangkitnya dia bersama jantung kembali mengepam nadi.

Wings

If you could untie your wings
and free your soul of jealousy,
you and everyone around you
would fly up like doves.

~ Rumi

***

Was a Raven.
Now an Eagle.

Fly up high.
Life goes on.

Chambers

An engineer, an accountant, a business student, or a designer?

***

Since heart has four chambers. 

Only one of them will make it. 

Or else none. 

And maybe next time.

Ignorance

Yes, I'm ignoring everyone.

TBC.

Rezeki

Alhamdulillah. Peluang demi peluang diberikan kepada saya dari beberapa orang yang mengenali saya, staf-staf lama yang tahu bagaimana cara saya bekerja tapi saya juga perlu hormat kepada majikan saya yang telah memberikan saya peluang bekerja untuk mereka walaupun mereka tahu saya adalah pelajar sepenuh masa. Mungkin ada orang akan kata bodohlah saya kalau menolak tawaran begini. Saya berani tolak sebab saya kini seorang pekerja tetap, saya masih lagi belajar, dan yang paling penting sebab Mak saya yang suruh saya tolak. Secara peribadinya, saya terpaksa menolak tawaran yang datang kali ini atas alasan notis pendek. Saya percaya pada rezeki Allah dan ini mungkin bukan rezeki saya dan saya sangat berharap rakan saya terpilih untuk mengisi jawatan tersebut. InsyaAllah, peluang lain akan datang lagi. Amin. =)

STS vs PHP

What other's think we learn:
Science, Technology and Sustainability.

What we actually learnt:
Policy, History and Philosophy.

‪#‎STS‬
‪#‎PostGrad‬
‪#‎FacultyOfScience‬

Tiga Bulan: Kewujudan

Aku tersenyum melihat gambar yang kamu baru saja muatnaik ke laman Twitter. Sahabat aku kata muka kamu sama macam aku, lihat saja saiz badan kita pun kelihatan sama; kurus tinggi. Dulunya aku sedikit yakin kalau perasaan kita juga sama tapi kini aku lebih yakin bahawa kamu sudah ada yang lain. Kecewa, ya sedikit kecewa kerana aku belum sempat mengenali kamu seperti yang lainnya. Atas alasan ini ia mungkin menimbulkan rasa tidak adil untuk menolak kewujudan kamu secara penuh. Jadi sedikit harapan itu mungkin masih ada. Tak banyak, sedikit saja.

Jika tiga bulan yang lepas ialah hari pertama kita bersua muka dan terputus hubungan begitu saja mungkin aku tak terasa kepedihan di jiwa. Tapi dua bulan yang lepas kamu yang mulakan perkenalan senyap tapi kemudian kamu lenyap. Jadi dua bulan ini aku cuma bazirkan masa lapangku dia antara waktu bekerja dan belajar, siang dan malam menjadi pembaca setia garis masa kamu di Twitter. Pedih, ya sedikit pedih kerana aku boleh melihat betapa aktifnya kamu di laman tersebut. Beginilah saudara, biarkan aku putuskan cerita. Jikalau sekali lagi kita bersua muka, aku sendiri yang akan sudahkan apa yang kamu mulakan.

Boleh ya, saudara?

Pending~

Pending assignment/task for this week:

Tuesday - Article group presentation
Wednesday - Class
Thursday - Critics initial proposal presentation
Friday - Article group presentation, essay submission and individual essay presentation
Saturday - Science Shop proposal submission

‪#‎STS‬
‪#‎PostGrade‬
‪#‎facultyOfScience‬

Single?

Are you a single girl?

Trust me, it's a bless for not having a boyfriend, seriously.

Looking forward for January for a good news! Or else it might be on June. =)

Pergi - Balik

Dari Publika Solaris ke Solaris Mont Kiara.

Pergi, jalan kaki dengan panas terik.
Balik, naik teksi dengan hujan lebat.

Masuk office dengan baju basah memang tak kachak!

Forgive

If only a dinner treat can forgive someone. But it's not.

Aliran

Dulu; saya pelajar sains tulen sampai degree.
Sekarang; saya pelajar master sains sosial.
Dulu dan sekarang; jiwa tetap sastera!

***
Tak kisah pun kalau aliran sains atau sastera, rezeki bukan di tangan manusia.
Lebih epik bila yang tak belajar tinggi lebih berjaya. Memang sentap!

Bengang; Alasan Di Sebaliknya

Seorang Izzah memang berhak untuk bengang pada hari kejadian tersebut. Ini berikutan nasib malang yang menimpa beliau, seperti biasa bukan sekali dua tapi bertimpa-timpa sehingga terduduk di tangga. Kronologi malang seorang Izzah pada hari kejadian adalah seperti berikut:

1. Terlepas KTM yang terawal dua minit dari waktu kebiasaan, jadi beliau mengambil keputusan untuk menaiki bas dan turun di kota raya Kuala Lumpur
2. Disebabkan sudah berada di Kuala Lumpur, maka beliau pun mendaftar kad Touch 'N Go pelajar di Stesen LRT Pasar Seni dan dikenakan yuran sebanyak RM110 dan terpaksa mengambil gambar dengan memakai baju kurung moden berwarna merah
3. Sedar sudah terlewat mahu ke kelas, beliau terus menaiki LRT dari stesen tersebut hingga ke LRT Universiti, maka ditakdirkan hujan pun turun dengan lebatnya
4. Dengan gigih beliau menunggu bas T632 yang memasuki UM kerana khuatir jika menaiki teksi dalam keadaan begitu akan dikenakan tambang yang mahal, maklumlah jalan di kawasan tersebut asal hujan memang confirm jammed dan banjir
5. Walaupun agak hairan dengan langit yang terang namun masih mampu memuntahkan hujan yang lebat, beliau terus berlari ke arah Fakulti Sains dengan keadaan basah kuyup
6. Sebaik sampai di bilik kuliah, beliau mendapati pintu grill dikunci dan bermanggakan stainless steel 
7. Beliau agak yakin bahawa kelas pada hari itu habis agak awal, maklumlah orang selalu masuk kelas lambatlah katakan, beliau mengambil keputusan untuk berehat sebentar di surau sambil menunggu hujan reda
8. Hujan yang sedari tadinya mulai berintik-rintik kini mulai melebatkan diri. Beliau tiada pilihan lain, maka berlarilah beliau meredah hujan sekali lagi
9. Beliau mula menghantar teks mesej kepada rakan-rakan beliau, memaklumkan bahawa beliau akan sampai lewat di LRT Universiti akibat hujan lebat. Kesemua rakan beliau sudahpun sampai terlebih dahulu

***

Will be continue

Tanggal Tiga, Purnama Kelapan

"Izzah dah berapa lama kerja kat sini?" tanya kakak Secretary.

"Aaa...7 bulan lebih. Eh, tak! 8 bulan. Hari ni, 8 bulan," jawab seorang Izzah.

"Dah 8 bulan kerja pun lupa. Hahaha! Tinggal kat mana?" tanya kakak Secretary lagi.

"Saya tinggal kat sini. Kat taman depan tu (konon lokasi dirahsiakan).

"Oh, dekatnya. Akak keluar rumah awal takut jalan jammed," sambungnya lagi.

"Saya datang kerja jalan kaki," balas Izzah, sambung buat kerja sendiri. 

***

Sejujurnya, aku menghitung hari-hari bila aku boleh berhenti setiap kali datangnya tanggal tiga, seperti hari ini.

Jatuh dan Bangkit

Dari saat setiap kejatuhan,
Bangkit berkali walau ditolak bertubi,
Sampai bila mahu bergaduh, bermusuhan?
Ayuh, bangsaku. Kuatkanlah kaki kita berdiri.

Bengang

Kalau ada, cakap ada. Kalau tak ada, cakap jelah tak ada. Kenapa nak bagi orang berteka-teki sendiri? Kau tengah main game ke kau tengah gamekan orang?

My time is fixed. Work, study and music, less time for myself since I finished high school. If I can managed to slot you in my hectic schedule, please please and please APPRECIATE IT! Don't act and assume like other people is so free to entertain you. I better get some sleep or do my assignments rather than waste my time with you.

And what is the point for having a SMARTPHONE if you don't know how to use it? Just send me a simple text to notify and inform kalau tak campak longkang jelah!

So chicken. So meh. So boo!~

November

And remember,

Today is already November.

#Fifteen

As the time flies,
And Sun is rise,
Then you realized,
That you're not wise.

October 30, 2014.

Mangsa - Pemangsa

Direntap-rentapnya jiwa,
Ditoreh-torehnya luka,
"Hentikan!" teriak Si Mangsa.

Digapainya sosok itu yang kian lunyai berdarah sana sini,
Parah benar nampaknya adegan aksi dua manusiawi,
Mahu ditolong atau berdiam diri? Duga aku sendiri.

"Kau harus mampus!" bentak Si Pemangsa,
"Perempuan sundal macam kau tak layak untuk hidup! Tak layak untuk cinta!"
"Aku mahu simpan kau lagi untuk apa?"

Aku diam, pasang telinga.

Invisible

Bolehkah kau melihat aku tika aku tidak kelihatan?

***

Will you see me when I am invisible?

Sekali Ini

Kalaulah mampu aku katakan yang aku mahu berjumpa dengan kau sekali ini, 

aku mohon benar sekali ini saja. 

Aku mahu dengar dari mulut kau sendiri apa sebenarnya yang dah terjadi. 

Aku mahu tahu semua, mahu tahu segalanya, mahu tahu apa yang kau pendam, 

rahsiakan, apa yang terbuku, berkerak dalam lubuk hatimu.

Benarkan aku ketahui kesakitan apa yang kau lalui kerna aku lebih sakit hati mati, 

melihat kamu menanggung sendiri.

I Want To Touch A Dog

Seharian menahan diri dari memberi pendapat 20 sen akhirnya tak berjaya. Kesian Si Anjing, tak bersalah pun.

***
Walaupun saya rasa anjing lebih comel dan jauh lagi bijak dari kucing, memelihara anjing apatah lagi memegangnya bukanlah norma bagi masyarakat kita; Melayu Islam yang jauh beza dengan umat Islam berbangsa lain.

***
Malas nak cerita nanti kena hentam habis dibuka segala dalil, riwayat dan hadith. Sudahlah Si Melayu ini langsung tak percaya pada adat.

Jaga-jaga, jangan sampai timbul fitnah. Najis yang kotor boleh disamak, hati yang kotor bersihkanlah sendiri.

January

Looking forward for a good news after exam in January.

Meanwhile, preparing myself as what I used to do as routine when I'm in boarding school, ten years ago.

Slowly, nawaitu will be ease. Alhamdulillah.

Sebulan dan Sepuluh Hari

Sebulan dan sepuluh hari,
Aku lihat cerminku retak lagi,
Teringatkan kamu barangkali?
Walau sudah puasku padamkan memori.

Sebulan dan sepuluh hari,
Ku curi-curi baca Twittermu lagi,
Ada sedikit cemburu dalam hati,
Mungkin kau sudah ada pengganti.

Sebulan dan sepuluh hari,
Aku terus cuba tenangkan diri,
Yakinkan hati kau akan kembali,
Kalau benar kita ada jodoh lagi.

Sebulan dan sepuluh hari,
Aku telah terperangkap kini,
Dalam permainan hati bersegi-segi,
Hanya puisi peneman di kala sunyi.

Sebulan dan sepuluh hari,
Berteka-teki lagi aku sendiri,
Apa benar kau langsung tak peduli?
Aku terus menanti, sebulan dan sepuluh hari.

***
Hari ke-40.

Tua dan Matang

Ada beza antara orang tua dengan orang matang.

Orang tua tak semestinya matang. Orang matang tak semestinya tua;
Orang tua harap umur je meningkat tapi mungkin masih bersikap seperti seorang kanak-kanak.
Orang matang walaupun masih kanak-kanak tapi sudah bersikap seperti seorang dewasa.

***
Sekarang, aplikasikan pula konsep tadi kepada ini.

Seorang Muslim tidak semestinya Melayu.
Seorang Melayu belum tentu lagi Muslim.

Pedas bukan?

Sempit, Sabar dan Syukur

Saat hidup dirasakan sempit.
Saat hati diuji dengan sabar.
Saat itulah rezeki datang tanpa disangka.

Alhamdulillah. Syukur.

#Sixteen

When the clock keep tick-toking,
When the time keep on wasting,
When the shadow keep on following,
You realized that you are running...

September 30, 2014.

Lambat

Jumaat, 25 September 2014.

Seorang Izzah memasuki kelas lebih kurang pada pukul 7.

Dr: Finally, Izzah is here. Your name is?
Iz: My name is Izzah.
Dr: Izzah Aziz ke Izzah Hanim?
Kelas: Izzah Aziz.
Dr: Izzah yang selalu datang lambat tu yang mana?
Kelas: Izzah Aziz.

#SFGS6123

Who need one?

Week 3, Sem 2.

When you realized friends from your batch stop talking to you, trying to avoid you, and willing to choose anyone else except you for grouping.

And still didn't approve your friend request for almost two months! Why???

Five days in a week going to class and being isolated for no reason. I'm freaking tired. Like I said. This gonna be tough!

La Tahzan. La Tahzan. La Tahzan.

As we grow older, we don't need so many friends. So I keep some in my pocket.

I know I don't wear hijab and I don't have a boyfriend like them. Seriously? Who need one? Meh.

Good night!

Malang

Hujan.
Hari yang panjang.
Dan malang yang bertimpa-timpa.

Definisi Tak Kool 2

Perempuan yang tak kool dari kaca mata seorang Izzah apabila mereka ini kurus tinggi.

Yang disertai dengan sifat seperti ini:

1. Tidak tahu malu
2. Tidak tahu berusaha
3. Tidak tahu berdikari
4. Kaki kikis
5. Sundal

Kalau ada 1 hingga 5 kriteria, jangan personal message saya!

Definisi Lelaki Tak Kool

Lelaki yang tak kool dari kaca mata seorang Izzah apabila mereka ini kurus tinggi.

Yang disertai dengan sifat seperti ini:

1. Tidak peramah
2. Tidak budiman
3. Tidak kemas
4. Serabai
5. Buncit

Kalau ada 1 hingga 5 kriteria, jangan personal message saya!

March 30

"I like you"

"A lot, I think"

Since March 30.

2013.

Definisi Chantek

Perempuan yang chantek dari kaca mata seorang Izzah tidaklah perlu tinggi melampai, berbadan ramping, berhidung mancung, berkulit putih gebu, dan sebagainya seperti yang diidam-idamkan oleh para pria dan teruna.

Tetapi perempuan yang sifatnya seperti ini:

1. Tidak gedik
2. Tidak berkasut tinggi
3. Tidak bermekap tebal
4. Sukakan kesederhanaan
5. Bercelak mata

Kalau ada yang nombor 1, memang mintak dirijek terus.
Kalau padan 3 hingga 5 kriteria boleh personal message saya.
Tapi nak buat apa?

Definisi Kachak

Lelaki yang kachak dari kaca mata seorang Izzah tidaklah perlu tinggi melampai, berbadan sado, berhidung mancung, berkulit sawo matang, dan sebagainya seperti yang diidam-idamkan oleh para gadis dan wanita.

Tetapi lelaki yang sifatnya seperti ini:

1. Tidak merokok

2. Tidak bermain muzik

3. Tidak menonton bola

4. Sukakan kucing

5. Berkaca mata
6. Satu kriteria rahsia

Kalau ada yang bertentangan dengan nombor 1, anda memang mintak dirijek terus.

Kalau padan 3 hingga 5 kriteria boleh personal message saya.

Tapi ada ke? =/

Relationshit!

Single and complicated since 2005. </3

December 14, 2012.

Rubbish

Ada sorang so called rock star baru invite click like band dia, bila tengok rupanya dah lama like. Dengan sengaja, terus unlike. Sorry dude, you shouldn't look down on me last year. Kau tahu major instrument aku bass tapi kau paksa aku main guitar. Dan apa yang nak bangga sangat kalau kau dapat top 30 AF 5 je bukan dapat masuk AF pun~ =.=

And the reason why I stop drinking coke!

December 18, 2012.

New Chapter

May the shine bright, 

All the way until night.

December 28, 2012.

Sesuatu

Ada sesuatu yang tak kena
Selawat ke atas nabi tiga kali
Bacaan Al-Fatihah tiga kali
Kalau ada, maka adalah
Kalau tidak pun tak apalah

Sebulan

Sebulan yang lepas

Aku nampak kau dan kawan-kawan

Itu pun kita jumpa di rumah kawan kita juga

Terdetik dalam hati "oh, dia nampak macam artis"

Tapi tak ada sekali pun kau nak ajak borak

Dan aku pun tak ada rasa nak ambil tahu lebih

Dua minggu yang lepas

Kawan kita kata ada kawan mahu berkenalan

Aku berteka-teki siapa orangnya

Dia sibuk hantar teks dan bila dia emailkan gambar kau

Aku kata dalam hati "oh, dia inilah yang nampak macam artis!"

Terus dia beri nombor telefon aku pada kau

Seminggu yang lepas

Masih tertunggu-tunggu juga kalau ada kiriman teks

Rasa ingin tahu kenapa semakin lama semakin menebal

Jadi aku mulakan dulu mahu tahu apa reaksi kau

Kau cuma minta maaf dan kata kau jarang berada dalam talian

Aku cuma mampu kata "ah tak apa"

Isnin yang lepas

Kau cakap terima kasih sebab beri hadiah pada kau

Itu pun aku berikan pada kawan kita

Tapi kau tetap minta maaf sebab tak berada dalam talian

Aku kata "ini hal kecil tak perlu minta maaf"

Terus tiada apa lagi mahu dibalas

Dan sehingga hari ini

Kau masih lagi kawan kepada kawan

Kawan alam maya yang jarang berada dalam talian

Kawan yang aku tak pernah dengar suara dan berkenalan

Kawan yang cuma buat aku terus tertanya-tanya

Kenapa kita terus berkawan hingga sebulan?

Sakit

Dah jatuh, terus bangkit!
Sakit. Ya. Memang sakit.

Istighfar, hati ini daging yang penuh penyakit.

Favorite Quotes

When I let you to hold my bass, its mean I let you to hold my breath. (Qis'z Aziz, January 21, 2012)

A bassist without her bass is just like Eve without her Adam. (Qis'z Aziz, January 20, 2012)

Forgive those who insult you, attack you, belittle you, or take you for granted. But more important than this...forgive yourself for allowing them to hurt you. (Anonymous, December 2011)

"I can be your friend, your brother, and your hubby too..." (Unknown, November 11, 2011)

IzzAh IqIz AzIz, If someone you love hurts you cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it. :) (Megat Muhamad Yaesree, October 2011)

A man's feelings is a plank of wood. It takes fire to burn it. A girl's feeling is a stack of glasses. Tap one and all will shatter at once. (Qis'z Aziz, August 2011)

"Qiz, apa-apa perasaan yang positif bermula dengan suka, kemudian dia akan expand till u can't imagine it anymore...," (Deck, March 31, 2011)

“I’m single for the past 5 years and gonna be single for another 6 years in the future,” (Iqiz, A., 2010)

My name is Izzah..preferred to be call as Ija..better known as Angah..also known as Iqiz..but you can just call me Qis'z..or Eve.. (Iqiz, A., 2003)

Tanggal Yang Tiga

Hari ini,
Tanggal yang tiga bulan ini,
Sudah enam purnama aku di sini,
Agak-agak bila boleh berhenti?

Shave

Terbangun dari jam lima tadi.
Terasa macam nak shave kepala lagi.

Mahu ke kedai atau buat sendiri?

Puisi Hati Mati

Tamat sudah tempoh satu hari,
Kau biarkan aku berteka-teki,
Sampai aku rasa sakit hati.

Diberi peluang langsung tak peduli,
Sekarang masa untuk padamkan bukti,
Cuma aku tinggalkan ini puisi untuk kau fahami.

Jangan kau tanya pada ukhti,
Ke mana mahu aku angkat kaki,
Dan tolonglah jangan dicari-cari.

Satu lagi,
Tolonglah pergi,
Jangan kembali.

***
Maafkan aku, kawan kepada kawan.
Mungkin aku terlalu pelik untuk kau buat teman.

Si Perawan

Langit sudah jatuhkan hujan,
Sehari suntuk sedih tak berkesudahan,
Terlalu banyak mahu dikeluhkan,
Dipilih berdiam tabah wahai Si Perawan.

Gula-gula Kapas

Ini cerita tahun lepas.

***
Aku beri dia gula-gula kapas.
Tapi dia beri aku hampas!

Dia memang lelaki yang loser.
Sebab mengalah sebelum aku surrender.

***
Selamat hari putus kawan. =)

#CottonCandy
#SeksiOvari
#ShortPoem

Dear August

Dear August,

I wish you all the best.

Good luck in your future.

Be strong and strive.

Sincerely,

July.

Permanent?

Oh my god! Seriously? What a surprise! 

As I'm a full time student, I didn't expect this. But hey, thanks! =)

How To Stay Positive?

Recite these magic words;

Saya hensem!
Saya kacak!
Saya macho, penuh bergaya! =D

#colours

Gigih

Pelik tengok benda ni takde kepala. Pegang sikit tengkuk dia baru tahu hidup lagi rupanya.

Si Anak Burung. Gigih pekerti.
Cuba terbang tinggi. Walau jatuh banyak kali.

**
Hei, manusia. Selamat pagi!

How Can I Help You?

"My journey isn't over, and neither is yours."

How Can I Help You?

**
He said,
"everything in life is temporary,
if things are going good, enjoy it,
if things are going bad, don't worry,
it won't last forever either."

July 6, 2014.

Si Rabun

Hari ni masuk office pukul 9 sebab entah kenapa aku tak boleh bangun. Paling tak boleh blah bila aku lupa bawak spek datang kerja. Aku lupa aku rabun sebenarnya. Oh. >.<'''

Si Rabun yang pakai cermin mata dari darjah enam. Makanya sudah 14 tahun dan aku masih tak biasa. Loser!

Sedang Cari Penulis Untuk Tanpa Nama

Oh my god! Korang serious? Kenapa aku baru tau ni? Gua mana ada Twitter and Facebook sekarang! >.<

=====

Sila hantar ke kamitanpanama@gmail.com dengan subjek "Join TN".

i. Nama (tak nak anonymous) / Nama glemer kalau anda glemer.

ii. Tweethandle & URL fesbuk

iii. Contoh puisi. 5 buah puisi yang anda tulis sendiri .

iv. Sebab paling jujur anda boleh bagi kenapa nak join Tanpa Nama.

Baca lagi di Tanpa Nama

=====

Oh. Hmm. Ok. Aku cuba.

Kelakar

Jujurnya. Aku kecewa. Dengan dunia. Jadi aku deactivatekan semua - Facebook dan Twitter. Malah beberapa nombor juga disekat dari hubungan.

Tapi aku lupa aku punya blog, bukan satu tapi TIGA! Jadi aku fikir dari aku teruskan contengan yang kelihatan sia-sia baiklah aku contengkan saja di blog semula.

Jadi, ya. Aku ada TIGA, yang patutnya berlainan fungsinya.

1. http://iqizaziz.blogspot.com/ Kali terakhir pos pada 2011.
2. http://iqizmusic.blogspot.com/ Kali terakhir pos pada 2012.
3. http://iqizstory.blogspot.com/ Kali terakhir pos pada 2013.

Kelakar.

Revive

It has been so long after I deactivate my Facebook and Twitter account. It just happen that I was randomly reading some blog yesterday and it somehow, push me to write something in my blog. REVIVE!

And the story will be reveal. Slowly, sooner or later.